A Blog by John Bossong

5 Great Tips for Effective Connecting

Why do you connect? Connecting is how business is done today. It’s a connection economy. It doesn’t matter if you connect with 3, 300, 3,000 or 30,000.  If you can’t connect with people beyond a transactional level, you won’t be able to influence or lead them.

Author Rick Warren offers 5 tips that can help you connect. Really connect. Not a Twitter follow or a Facebook like (nothing wrong with either of those). But a deep connection. A relational connection.



Connecting Tips


1. Take The Initiative.

Leadership application: you can’t connect with anyone if you don’t initiate contact. Make the phone call. Send the email. Go have lunch. Leaders initiate and start things. If you want to connect, you have to be proactive. Is there a connection you need to make? What’s stopping you? Probably fear of rejection. A no reply or no response back. You will never know if you don’t take the initiative.

2. Commitment.

Leadership application: true relationships (connections) involve commitment. When someone knows you are committed to the relationship they will connect. When the people you lead know you are committed to the vision, they will connect and buy-in. Without commitment you can’t connect. Commit to commitment and connect.

3. Use Constructive Words.

Leadership application: author and leadership expert Bill Hybels states in the book Axiom that language matters.

The very best leaders I know wrestle with words until they are able to communicate their big ideas in a way that captures the imagination, catalyzes action, and lifts spirits. All because they understand language matters – Bill Hybels, Axiom.

He’s right. How easy is it for you to gain commitment when you hammer away at your people all day long? People need encouragement and kindness, not a big ego and pride. What you say and how you say it is important. If you want to connect and lift spirits, language matters.  Choose wisely.

4. Be Considerate.

Leadership application: nothing helps you connect better than the golden rule. Treat other people how you want to be treated. If you do this one thing with your internal and external customers you will see an immediate ROI. The investment is changing your mindset and paradigm. When you are considerate, people know you care. When they know you care they will connect.

5. Tell it Like it Is.

Leadership application: don’t sugarcoat everything. When you (as the leader) mess up (you will) don’t blame and make excuses. Just admit it and move on. Model this for the people you lead. You are not perfect and shouldn’t pretend to be. We all make mistakes and do things we are not proud of. Admit it and move on. Learn and grow. Be human.

John Maxwell – Everyone Communicates, Few Connect


Key Thoughts From The Video

1. Connecting increases your influence in every situation.

2. Connecting defined: Identify with people and relate to them in such a way that it increases your influence with them.

3. Leadership is influence.

Have a great weekend. Connect and lead.

What other ways can you connect to improve your influence?


  1. These are great, John!

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